Why is my teenager not coming to see me at weekends or at our weekly arrangements?

You may have noticed your teenage child pulling back or putting up resistance in regard to the arrangements for visits with you. The precious time you battled over in Court or agreements decided by a judge no longer work or seem to apply to your child. Your teenager always seems too busy with their friends, or in pursuit of their hobbies or other extra activities on the time that was agreed for you to see them. To reassure you, teenagers have a lot to think about and may have priority list that looks like this:




So if you are the weekend parent, or non-resident parent, you may feel as though you are falling further down the list. It is normal for young people to want to hang out with their friends.  Their next pressure is schooling, so when it comes to parents, well yes, you are further down that list. Also, they will want to avoid the possible tension between you and other parent. They are full of other preoccupations and may not want to deal with the emotional journey that takes place each time they have to transition between you as parents. It may feel like they are avoiding you but actually they are dealing with a lot already (please see previous article). It is a fine balancing act being a teenager.